HOLDMINE GUIDES

How do I talk to my parents about their care wishes?

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How to navigate the trickier topics.

The sad truth is, we all will finish our laps around the sun and those we love and that love us, will have to say their farewells, grieve, and on top of that, manage our estate.

This is a complex process, one with lots of elements and details to be ironed out so taking time to have our own estates in order, and to encourage those we love to do the same is really important.

When having those conversations with loved ones, the intention is to deeply understand their wishes. That likely means carefully planning and then curating the conversation, managing your own emotionality and asking great questions to really understand what they’re wanting. It’s a hard conversation to have, yet one that can reduce some of the stress and pressure for the family, at one of life’s most difficult times.

Have a conversation with your family about your end-of-life wishes while you are healthy. No one wants to have that discussion... but if you do, you'll be giving your loved ones a tremendous gift, since they won't have to guess what your wishes would have been, and it takes the onus of responsibility off of them.

- Jodi Picoult

Why talking about the tough stuff matters.

Losing a loved one, no matter how organised you are, really is like a tsunami of emotion and overwhelm, that nothing really prepares you for, so by taking care of some of the details ahead of time, we know it’ll allow a little more space to be present with those you love.

Key topics our guide covers

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Tips on how to start the conversation

The best tip is that the ‘start’ is not the conversation itself, it’s planning ahead and setting it up well for everyone. Read more about this here

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Technical topics covered

The terminology can be overwhelming, we’re breaking down a few of these concepts into plain language for you

Conversation starters to get things flowing

Knowing the questions to ask to gain a deeper understanding of someone’s perspective or wishes is essential, here’s some to make your life a little easier

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Having crucial conversations

Building skills around how to engage on sensitive topics is always helpful, not just during critical life moments, so we’re sharing some ways to build these

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After passing wishes

There’s a wide range of possibilities for saying farewell to someone you love, or how you might wish to be, we touch on what these could be so you can make the choices that best honour you and your loved ones

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Ethical wills

A beautiful way of capturing values, lessons and stories that are important for your family, whānau, loved ones

Here’s the free guide to help you navigate these important but tough conversations

Download our free guide, to help you navigate the trickier topics with your loved ones - so you can enjoy more life with them

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  • “When Dad died, he had already set me up as his Legacy Contact. I knew, when I arranged his funeral that I was respecting his wishes. That meant a lot”

    VB, 36. Auckland.

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Explore what Holdmine has to offer

A set of features, made with a purpose to make yours and your families lives easier - so you have time to enjoy life with your family.

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Learn about Holdmines roots

Founded here in Ōtautahi Christchurch, Holdmine is the realisation of an idea to make life easier for us all as we navigate those big life moments.

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Our plans sure to cover your needs

We all know making decisions in life can be hard, that’s why here at Holdmine we have made it super easy for you to sign up for the plan that best suits your needs.